The first time you learned about anilingus—also known as rimming, tossing salad, ass eating, peach munching, eating the booty like groceries—you probably thought to yourself, “Wait, people seriously do this? What the flying fuck?!” Yes, all kinds of couples enjoy eating some delicious booty. That’s because it can feel incredible to stimulate the nerve endings around the anus, not to mention there’s something sexy and “taboo” about the act that turns some people on.

All of which is to say, it makes sense that you’re curious about how to eat ass. Lucky for you, I’ve eaten well over 500 booties, and I’ve definitely had mine eaten two to three dozen times. I love eating ass, which is why I do it in nearly every sexual encounter I have. I could live off of eating ass for breakfast, lunch, and dinner until I died. Luna Matatas, a sex and pleasure educator, and Alicia Sinclair, founder and CEO of b-Vibe, a line of innovative vibrating anal toys, are also experts in the field. We’re here to teach you tips and techniques for eating ass correctly, including all the best moves, and how to make sure your partner is properly prepared.

Here’s everything to know about how to eat ass like a pro.

How should my partner prepare for a rim job?

Needless to say, you want to make sure that you or your partner has a clean butthole before you chow down. The good news is that you don’t have to do a full douche or enema before tossing salad. That’s because when you eat a booty, you’re focusing on the external part of the anus. If you happen to have a long and slippery tongue, you may be able to get a half-inch in there, but nothing more. You only need to douche if you’re planning on taking a lengthier penis or dildo that gets deeper inside you.

Really, all you need to do is wash the external anal area with some gentle, antibacterial soap and water. That’s it. “If you’re just getting right down to things, you can do a visual and sniff test and communicate,” Matatas says. “Ask your person if they want to get their butthole ready for your mouth, or if they need to ‘freshen up.’”

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Cleanliness isn’t just important for enjoyment, it’s also necessary to help prevent the transfer of harmful bacteria. “Rimming can run the risk of transferring harmful gut bacteria, like E. coli or salmonella, from the person being rimmed (receiver) to the person doing the rimming (giver),” Matatas says. That’s why you should skip rimming if you or your partner has an upset stomach. Having diarrhea or stomach pain is a telltale sign that you had some contaminated food with harmful bacteria.

It’s important to warm up, too. “A lot of people have this perception that they don’t need to do any foreplay with rimming, but just like with every other type of sexual experience, you want to warm up,” Sinclair says in Men’s Health Best. Sex. Ever.

“Start by teasing the anus,” she says. “Make circles with your tongue, lick it like ice cream, and play with the entire booty. Really get your hands on it. Spank it. Shake it!” Once your partner is warmed up and ready for more, you can go deeper into the rim job.

What’s the best position for eating ass?

You need to find ass-eating positions that are comfortable for both you and your partner. “You want the receiver to be able to relax into the sensations, while you’re comfortable giving continuous stimulation for an extended period,” Matatas explains.

Doggy style:

The classic go-to position for rimming is doggy style. This is particularly popular among queer men, because after rimming, you’re in the perfect position to have anal sex. Sometimes, angling can be slightly difficult for the giver in that position, at which point the receiver can lay flat down on their stomach. From there, it’s easy for you to spread those cheeks and dive right in.

Spread eagle:

Another common position is when the receiver is on their back with their legs spread, or—if they’re an expert contortionist—behind their head. “Use a pillow to prop up their pelvis, so you don’t tire out your neck from that strenuous angle,” says Matatas. You really want to tilt their butthole up, so you can feast like a king.

Face sitting:

“Face-sitting is also fun to explore, but can be challenging for both the giver and the receiver,” Matatas says. “Prop up your head with a pillow to bring your face closer to their anus. The person being rimmed can use a bed or a wall to help balance their weight off their knees and thighs.

Reverse face sitting:

You can also do a reverse face-sit, where the receiver is sitting on your face but they’re facing away from you.

Anilingus 69

From the reverse face-sitting position, you can easily transition into anilingus 69 (so they’re performing oral on you while you’re eating their booty). All the person on top has to do is lean all the way forward so they can perform oral sex on the partner who’s lying down. It’s a win-win!

What are the best techniques for eating ass?

There’s more to rimming than spreading those cheeks and licking. I mean, you could do that, and honestly, you both might enjoy it, but you do have other options if you want to get creative.

Matatas and I came up with a list of tips and techniques for eating ass. Of course, this is in addition to asking your partner what they prefer. That should be your go-to, but we recognize that many folks new to rimming might now know what they like, and even if they do know, it can be difficult to articulate. So here are some tips:

Tongue the folds.

“The crinkles of the anus have lots of nerve endings and fill up with blood as the body of the receiver gets more aroused and relaxed,” Matatas says. “Use your tongue to create circles around them.”

Use more than your tongue.

“Try using other parts of your face like your nose or chin,” she says. This is great in case your mouth and tongue start getting tired.

Give pleasure to surrounding anal areas.

“Lick the butt crack and use a sex toy or your other hand to stimulate the perineum, lower back, and genitals,” Matatas says.

Try a position where the receiver has control.

Try a position like face-sitting, which gives more power to the receiver; they can move their butt to control where their anus lands on your tongue and chin.

Experiment with speed, direction, and pressure.

“Allow for consistency and rhythm of one technique before moving to the next,” Matatas says. “Ask the receiver if they want it faster or slower and harder or softer. Use that feedback and adjust to their pleasure.”

Flatten the top of your tongue against their anus.

This creates a larger surface area for your tongue, so your partner gets more wetness and pressure from every lick.


Zachary Zane is a Brooklyn-based writer, speaker, and activist whose work focuses on lifestyle, sexuality, culture, and entertainment.

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