When the COVID-19 pandemic hit and a toilet paper shortage ensued, I decided, as did many others, to take the plunge(r) and buy one of the best bidets I could find. After much research, I purchased a Tushy Spa, which doesn’t use electricity and includes temperature control (read “warm water”) and an adjustable nozzle for hitting all your angles. I miraculously installed this bidet myself, which is possible with pretty much all models, and I freaking love it. I feel so clean and I use significantly less T.P.
I’ve long been a self-proclaimed bidet enthusiast. In my travels I’ve used bidets in even the most rural of towns in countries across Europe and Asia. It was in Japan that I realized just how game-changing bidets can be and how bizarre it seemed that more Americans don’t have them. There, I encountered self-cleaning bidets with heated seats and hot water (so good), adjustable water pressure, air deodorizers, warm air dryers, quietly closing lids, and even music you can play to mask your unseemly sounds. When I figured out what I was missing—what we’re all missing—I wondered why my home country is so averse to bidets. For a culture that seems fixated on cleanliness and purity, why draw a line at washing our private parts? If anything, bidets actually make you cleaner, and they’re far better for the environment, since they both save on toilet paper and encourage less frequent showers.
Thankfully, bidets (and particularly bidet attachments) are starting to catch on in the States. Bidet attachments slide beneath your existing toilet seat or replace it entirely. It’s an easy installation processes and is far more affordable than buying a freestanding bidet. You’ll find a multitude of models, including mechanical bidet seats and electric bidet seats, that are as no-frills or as fancy as your derriere desires. The cheaper models ($25–$100) include among them the Luxe Bidet Neo 120, Brondell bidets, Bio Bidets, and SELF Certified Tushy Classic, and they generally feature simple cold water with nozzles that adjust water pressure. The higher-end electric bidets, like the Toto Washlet, Omigo, and Tushy Ace, have heated seats, night lights, warm-air dryers, rear wash, feminine wash, and so much more.
As one of the bidet’s biggest fan(nies), I’ll share these crucial notes for the entry-level owners: (1) “The water is cold!” I hear you protesting. Honestly, this is not a big deal, IMO. It’s not like the bidet shoots a freezy pop at your butt. It’s just water. Your body can handle it, or you can buy a model that includes warm water, which is admittedly nice on chilly nights. (2) Your first time using a bidet is almost always uncomfortable. I advise you to not get too wild when it comes to testing out tje water pressure controls; start as low as it goes before increasing pressure. It’ll take a little time to adjust, but when you do, there’s no going back!
Below, a selection of the best bidet attachments from Amazon, Target, Walmart, and more that you can really get behind, from affordable, unfussy attachments to top-of-the-line toilet toppers. Here’s wishing you the happiest of bidets.
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